My Dream:: My vision:: My Hopes

Do you have something that you are absolutely passionate about?
Something that if you did not have in your life then you would feel incomplete?

Some people go through life wondering...waiting...for that moment when they can figure out their place in this world. Sometimes we have to go through years of figuring it out, or maybe just dapple in a few experiences to have it dawn on us.

I have been one of the lucky ones. It didn't take me long to figure out where God's hand was directing me. My career passion has always been geared towards education. For seven years, I have been diligently putting myself in situations so I can gain more teaching experience. My passion is to teach children so they can glean useful information from life. It thrills me to see "lightbulbs" click on when a student finally understands something. Even though teaching can be quite demanding, I can not see myself doing anything else in life. It's my niche. It's where I belong.

For the last few months, it has dawned on me that passion isn't everything. Even though I'm passionate about teaching, it's some hard times we come from. The timing of when I graduated was smack dab in the middle of the economy seeing troubling times. If I had graduated one year earlier, I would already have a classroom... all my teacher friends got a job then. But life is uncertain and maybe there's a reason why I'm one year too late.

I recently read, "Oh the Places You'll Go!" to fifth grade students. Even though it's a children's book, it's very relevant to my life at 25 years old. If you've ever read it, I feel like I'm in the "waiting place". The place where you just wait for things to happen. Sometimes parts of life can be a waiting game, and am slowly realizing that this can be a good thing. If I had gotten a position right out of college, I may have burnt out pretty fast.

My hope and wish is that everyone can live out their dreams. I'm lucky because while I wait for this wish (teaching) to come true, I can do the most important thing in my life ever--be the best mommy to my son.

This is a part of pregnancy? Really?

It's amazing how much you don't know what pregnancy entails, until you are actually in the midst of it. There are many things I have been experiencing that never crossed my mind before pregnancy, such as: that I would be getting up at least 5 times during the night to pee, would not be able to breathe out of my nose for the past 2 months, acid reflux/heartburn are parts of the joys of pregnancy, even if you buy a new shirt or new pants one day--the next day they may already be too small. I also never would have thought gaining 35 pounds would be so easy to do (but then again, being pregnant during delicious holiday meals doesn't help either ;). If you are a mother, I'm sure you are laughing at my list because you know exactly what I'm talking about.

The weird and not-so-fun preggo list goes on and on....but there is only ONE thing that makes it all worth it in the end, and that's all that matters.

Baby Joshua is due in less than 4 weeks now (if he decides to show up on time or earlier)....and I am sooo ready!

::Home Sweet Home::

Home Sweet Home....
That's what I like to think when we lock up our doors at night, sit down with a cup of hot chocolate, and cuddle with the hubby and puppy. Even though Dale and I have only been in this house for two weeks, it is already feeling like we have been here for years...which is a very comforting feeling knowing that we found the right place for us. Our son, Joshua, will be arriving in less than six weeks, and I am already picturing him growing up in this house--climbing the trees in the backyard, building pillow forts in our living room, and celebrating many family holidays in the years to come.

We are very happy where we are in life right now. There was a lot that went on during the past month...some things we would like to forget and some things that we rejoiced about. Many times I think what a crazy woman I am for starting a new, stressful job as a substitute. Dale and I were also house hunting, and moved into our first home. Plus, doing all that while pregnant was not the greatest idea...but I was/am determined to make a home for our baby, and get my foot in the door in the teaching field. We also lost my grandmother and had her service the day we were supposed to move into our home. About two weeks before her death, I had written her a thank you note for giving me a rocking/gliding chair for the baby's room. I told her how I can't wait to rock my baby to sleep and read Joshua stories in that rocking chair. Also told her I can't wait to show her our new home once we are settled in. It's a little bittersweet to think about my last words to my grandmother....but I know she was very happy that we found the right home for us, and was extremely proud that she was going to have her first great-grandson.

Even with all the chaos of the month, we are sooo happy to be in our first home, and can't wait to have friends and family over.

My Baby Shower

A Shower Full of Love

october 16, 2010

Before you were conceived, I wanted you.

Before you were born, I loved you.
Before you were here an hour, I would die for you.
That is the miracle of life.
Maureen Hawkins, "The Miracle"

Coming together to be with some amazing women made my baby shower very special. It was a great bonding experience to laugh about what a little monkey my Joshua will be, my worries about juggling motherhood with my new job, and hearing stories from some new moms and those who are a little more seasoned in motherhood.

One of the games we played was:
"How Big is the Mommy's Tummy?"

My cousin Reiko was "generous" with measurement
haha (it was really funny)

Preview

My childhood friend surprised me!
She drove from CA just to be at the shower =)



I received some very special gifts...
one of them was a personalized scrapbook.....

A Superman blanket
(it even has our baby's name on it--Joshua Kalel)

...AND many other great gifts!

Before the shower, my mother gave me some great advice about motherhood:

In the coming months and years you might find yourself saying such things as: “We don’t eat Bella’s dog food.” “We don’t climb on the dishwasher door.” “What’s in your mouth?” Through it all, learn to laugh at yourself, your son and remember … it’s only for a short time. You only have a limited amount of time that you will be able to guide and influence Joshua’s every action. Raising little ones is exhausting and busy and adventurous. But it is only for a season. So be present in all the moments - in the hard ones, the funny ones and the joy-filled times. Don’t wish them away. Instead, be thankful that you get to experience each and every one of them.
God gives us these little people to enjoy, love, encourage, and teach. But keep in mind that our babies are, in reality, His. They are only on loan to us. He is entrusting you with one of His most precious creations. (Thoughts inspired from: “In its time - He has made everything beautiful in its time.” www.samuelmay.com).

I hope I can take these words of advice to heart and remember them throughout my parenting years. Joshua is a precious gift, and I don't ever want to take him for granted.

My favorite part was spending time with some of my favorite ladies. As I finish up the remaining months of pregnancy, and then welcome our precious bundle into the world....I will count on them to encourage and remind me to focus on the joys of motherhood (especially when lil' Joshie won't stop crying). Most importantly, it will be such a blessing to have these wonderful gals be a part of welcoming our sweet baby into this world.

Thanks ladies for making my day so special!
Love you all!

:::Let us rise up and be thankful:::

::::Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful. ~Buddha::::

It has come to my attention that I complain A LOT! The things that I usually complain about are things that I can't even change (getting sick, not feeling pretty because of the pregnancy, having to work, etc), but the ONE thing I can change is my attitude. A former pastor (Chuck Swindoll) of mine says it best: “The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes." So with this said, I'm going to work on overlooking the mishaps in life and focus on the every day gifts God gives us. Along with trying to have a better attitude, I want to try something else--keeping a "Blessings Journal". Every night I will write in the journal about things that went well that day/things that I see as blessings. Hopefully this will help me to overlook the bad and focus on the good in my life.

More pregnancy news

This morning we had our 13 week checkup. Dale and I were able to hear the baby's heartbeat again, and it sounded healthy--about 60 beats per minute. The doctor informed us that around 18 weeks we can find out the gender. I can't believe that's about a month away... we are sooo excited! We'll be counting down the days!

So far the pregnancy has been going rather smooth. Since this is our first pregnancy, we didn't know what to expect. Morning sickness has not really affected me (thank goodness!). There were a few weeks of nausea, but I continued to work and get things done around that.

I've kept a weekly log of new pregnancy experiences:
4 weeks (april 29)- migraines, vomiting, restless nights started
5 weeks- craving pineapple pizza, eating constantly (even in the middle of the night)
6 weeks- eating constantly
7 weeks- pee almost every 2 hours
8 weeks- extra nauseous
9 weeks- stomach pains from belly growing, ultrasound
10 weeks- craving strawberry waffles
11 weeks- back pains
12 weeks- not sleeping well
13 weeks- just started the 13th week :)

*Picture: i just bought this shirt, and couldn't resist not taking a picture. Instead of it saying "intel inside"... it says "Baby Inside". lol

Baby's First photoshoot =)

During my 9week checkup, we had the baby's first ultrasound. It was truly amazing how well defined the baby was at just a few weeks in utero. While I wait for our bundle of joy to arrive, I am making a pregnancy scrapbook. This week I included a picture of the 9 week ultrasound and my first written letter to our baby. This is what it says:

To my sweet baby
I have always dreamed of the day of becoming a mommy. Now that I am pregnant, it still feels like a dream. Not only do I dream about if you will be a boy or girl, what color hair you'll have, or what kind of person you will become, but most of all--what it will feel like to hold my sweet baby for the first time. When I was nine weeks pregnant, I had my first ultrasound. When Daddy and I saw your cute little body on the screen, we were beaming with joy. All we wanted was a healthy baby, and everything was going as planned. You had a strong heartbeat too--75 beat per minute! God has definitely answered my prayers. I have been given the best gift in the world--You! I couldn't ask for more. I love you so much! Love Mommy